Be Brave, be Proud; Pain and Peace – Philip Schofield

The news of Philip Schofield announcing he is gay is a big step. It’s a big step for many people.

The statement released by Schofe and the subsequent intervew he conducted with Holly on This Morning has been nothing short of heartfelt, honest and inspiring.

The circumstances he finds himself in, with the profile he has, would have undoutbedtly caused anxiety and stress as he so states but I’m so pleased that with the outpouring of support he has had from all manner of people, particularly his family have been able to put pay to much of the anxiety he would have had.

His family dynamic will now undoubtedly change but the ongoing support I wish upon him and his family I hope will not falter.

The way he talks of the pain and the guilt is something we can all resonate with when we’re trying to come to terms to a change, particularly if we beleive we are going to hurt others around us. We don’t like conflicting pain on others and the the fear and pain we conflict on ourselves in the pursuit of protecting others can be of real detriment to ourselves, without even knowing what the reaction of the others around us will actually be. It’s a terrifying trap we find ourselves in.

More communication on the hard subjects and facing the fear of communication will actually open the doors we need for peace within ourselves.

When we make decisions that hurt other people we need to remind ourselves that causing the pain was not our primary motive and that actually, seeking internal peace and clarity was the what we wanted to acheive. But as a lightbulb also emits heat as well as light, there will always be something else that happens as a result of our actions.

Keep your communication open and kind. Keep your intentions solid. Keep loving yourself and others.

Below are quotes from the interview that I find inspiring and wanted to share with you to show that with great courage comes pain too.

I hope that anyone who has heared this news this morning stewing over a life decision sees this and thinks, if he can do it and experience the hurt and guilt and still be open and talk about it, get strength to do the same too.

Well done Phil.

“Everyone I’ve spoken to have all be so supportive, loving and caring.

“Every person I tell, it gets a little lighter and lighter.

“But at the same time, I have made my decision, which is essential for me and essential for my head and it’s principle the reason why I’ve done this.

“So yeah, I feel a little lighter but I’m also very, very aware, there’s no question it causes pain and upset.”

“It’s tough but this is not something that’s happened quickly, I’ve had to deal this in my head for quite some time.

“I got to the stage where I thought we sit here, every day, and some amazingly brave person is sitting over there and I’m thinking ‘I have to be that person’.

“All you can be in your life is honest with yourself. I was getting to a stage in my life where I was thinking I don’t really like myself because I’m not being honest with myself.

“We always say ‘talk to someone’… and you must talk to someone. It’s brought me back from some dark places and in some cases talking to people saves you.”

“I’ve made this decision. It was my decision it was something I knew I had to do.”

“Yes, I am very conscious of the hurt, my overriding emotion with my family is guilt but at the same time I will sit here and say I am proud of myself today.”

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